I have just began to read your testamonies and just wonder how God keeps people going. I am a believer since I was 10 am now 35. I have not always had a close walk with the LORD though. When I was in high school I had a learning disorder, they didnt know what it was back then and my father thought I was just lazy. (He by the was was a Marine Corp man too) Now they say these are chemical imbalances. For the longest time even years I could not keep up and was always discouraged about how stupid I was or why I didnt get things like other kids did. So it left me to only be good at one thing and that was partying on the weekends with my friends. I lived to get drunk and smoke cigarettes. Thank God we did not do drugs or it could have been much worse.
My mother always took us to church since we were born. She is a very devoted christian and always had been. But I have often wondered about my sins. Its hard to be human and really believe that I am completely forgiven for all the bad things I did. I want more than anything to be in heaven one day. And even more so, my 2 boys. I've tried to keep them going to church the last 10 years or so and they are like me sometimes you like being there and sometimes you dont. My husband is a Deputy and he is not saved. He has said in a argument before that he does believe, but never has professed to others and just keeps telling me he is not ready to go to church when I ask him to go. I hate to go alone, everyone elses husbands are there with their wives. (I feel like the women think I have other reasons for being there) But I want a complete family in Christ. I just made the mistake of not praying for this from the very beginning and am having to do it backwards. Thank you for stepping out on Gods word. You will help alot of people. I just have a hard time forgiving myself.
Thank you for your time.
God Bless You!
My response is in Green:
I am glad my page helped you. You have a common problem. Many people have a hard time believing that they are forgiven or forgetting their own sins. The problem is that Satan will play with your emotions, the very name Satan means accuser. He is our accuser before God and before ourselves. He throws our sin in our faces as often as he can so that we will be ineffective as witnesses, and so that we will have doubts about our very salvation. The problem is that when we have those doubts we are believing we are just doubting ourselves, but that is not true. What we are truly doubting is God's promises. Let me show you what I mean:
(1 John 1:9 NIV) If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
This is a promise straight from God. It does not say He will forgive just the little sins, it says all, we just need to believe it.
(Acts 2:21 NIV) And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.
How do we call on the name of the Lord? By believing in Jesus Christ and asking Him to forgive us. Again this is a promise.
(Hebrews 10:17-23 NIV)  Then he adds: 'Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more.'
 And where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin.
 Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus,  by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body,  and since we have a great priest over the house of God,  let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.  Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.
He will remember our sins no more... He who promised is faithful. We just need to remember that and believe it.
Don't let Satan overwhelm you. Keep your eyes on Christ. Keep praying for your husband. Your witness will do more to bring him to Christ than anything you can say.
God bless you,
E-Mail Ralph (whose comments are in green)
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